The Walmart Cart

"When I see a fat person, I assume they are weak, overindulgent, and lazy. I also see them as not caring enough about themselves to take care of themselves or too stupid to know how. I get irritated when I see someone who is severely obese riding around Walmart or the grocery store in one of those ride-on carts with their basket full of chips and Twinkies. They have eaten themselves into being disabled. How sad."

I recently read the above comment on a forum I frequent. It hit a nerve for me. We all know that the General Public does contain people who assume and make judgements like this. I've heard numerous times how disgusting those people are who are "so fat they have to use a cart to shop" because they can no longer walk. But what shocked me just a little bit was that the above statements were made by an obese person on a weight loss forum. I guess I expected *slightly more* compassion and understanding from someone who has battled with weight.

But have you ever done the same? Have you been in the grocery store and come upon someone who is morbidly obese trucking around in a motorized cart and thought, "Geez, if they would JUST stop eating junk... How can they live like that... I would never let myself go to that point... They really need to WALK to get their food instead of being lazy"? Have you ever felt a little bit of disdain for the big lady in the Walmart cart? Judged her a little? Have you? What do YOU think of someone who is in a cart seemingly because of their weight?

Let me share a little story. Once upon a time there was a blogger. She was a very nice and sweet blogger, a lady who was morbidly obese but was determined to get the weight off. She started eating healthy and exercising and losing weight. She was still very large... at least 250 if I remember correctly... but she started signing up for 5k's. She was doing great! Every time she finished a race she felt so proud. One day as she was walking a 5k her leg started to hurt. She kept walking. It was difficult for her to finish, but she bravely pressed on and completed the 5k. Afterwards, she was exhausted but proud. She needed to go to the grocery store for food, but when she got there her leg was hurting quite badly. She looked at the motorized carts, thought it over for a minute and decided she didn't want to aggravate her possibly injured leg any further, and decided to use the cart to get around for her groceries. She rode around the store, got her things, and drove up to the checkout stand.

In line behind her were two thin ladies. They stared at her in her cart, then began loudly talking about her, saying things like, "It's disgusting that a person uses those carts just because she is FAT! Those are for disabled people" and "If she'd just put down the fork she wouldn't NEED that cart." The blogger sat quietly in her cart, her back to the women, tears welling in her eyes. When she finished her transaction, she went home and cried.

It makes me SO ANGRY that people think they have the right to make universal judgements and then apply them, out loud even, to real people. Yes, those people in the carts are not "THOSE PEOPLE", they are REAL PEOPLE, they are you and I and your mother and your grandma and your best friend. They are everyone and anyone, a human being whose circumstances you cannot POSSIBLY know nor do you have the right to judge. EVERY person has a story. Maybe it is a story of sloth or abuse or ignorance or addiction. Maybe it is a story of loss and love and hurt and joy. Or maybe it is the story of a victim, a hero, a mother, a nurse, a blogger. Maybe it is all of the above. Even a person who rescued a stranger's children from a burning house can end up in a Walmart cart. So can a foster mom who is the heart and hero of many lost children who finally found love. So can your daughter. So can you.

We all have stories. We have good and bad, proud moments and shameful ones. Any person you see at any moment may be at a high or low point or anywhere in between, and you cannot, you simply CANNOT accurately judge them Nor should you try. It's a moment in time and there is no way for us to know what came before or is to come for that person. They are somebody's son, somebody's daughter. Someone loved them once. Someone cares about them. They have feelings.

If this story about the blogger is YOUR story, please let me know. I read this several months ago on a blog I was reading, and I saved it in my brain to write about later. Then, when later came, I couldn't find the blog. I'd be glad to link to your story if you let me know. And let me say this: I have SO MUCH admiration for you and what you are doing. You are brave and wonderful. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. *****Edited to add: Thank you Debbie for sharing your story. Here is a link to the original story on her blog. This event happened after she completed a 5k despite a hurting knee & leg. Debbie is a wonderful person who is working hard to better her health. Check out her blog; she has completed SIX 5k's now. Such an inspiration!*****

Compassion is free. It costs you nothing to have kindness in thought, word, and action for people. And someday, you might like to have the favor returned. Let's try to be compassionate, and instead of thinking the worst about people, think the best. Imagine who that person used to be, might be now, and could become. Be kind. The world will be a better place because of it.